final essay

Griselda Mercado

Susie Huerta

English 1A

June 8, 2012

Corporations: A Terrible Entity

Our lives are full of propaganda telling us that we desperately need products that are

being sold. We are being charged the most that a corporation can charge for its product, while

the cost of production is much cheaper than what people are paying for the product. The

corporation is doing this tactic to reach its bottom line, which is to make as much profit as it can

for the least amount of expenses all for the sole purpose of increasing profits, and to please its

shareholders. Joel Bakan, author, and professor of Law at the University of British Columbia,

writes a novel, The Corporation, in which he reveals the true identity of the corporation. Bakan

goes in full detail of the mishaps that Corporations have done, some of which include exploiting

their workers, and putting profit above all else, including the safety of its customers. He also

describes how corporations build new companies in developing countries, because the cost of

labor is cheaper, and they can easily exploit the workers making them work in difficult

conditions, for multiple hours seven days a week. Joel Bakan also talks about social

responsibility, which is the obligation that corporations have towards society in which they don’t

emit much pollution into the air, and try to use recyclable material. Unfortunately, corporations

aren’t being socially responsible to society. The responsibility corporations should have to

society is to provide beneficial products to the general public, products that are safe and

efficient. The production of such products shouldn’t emit wastes, or pollution into the

environment, and corporations shouldn’t exploit the employees that provide their hard labor and

time for the production of such products.

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The customers are the ones that make it so corporations can continue selling products,

yet the products that are made are sometimes unsafe, and dangerous to the consumer. Bakan

points out in The Corporation that corporations have to pay large amounts of money to correct

their wrongdoings. Instead of paying for their misconduct they should make their product safe

for the consumer, it’s selfish and immoral for a corporation to put money over the safety of its

consumers. Joel Bakan says that in the view of corporations, it is immoral for the company to put

the safety of their consumers above their profit. If more profit comes by producing their product

in a way that is harmful for the consumer, then the company will make the product in the

harmful way. Bakan writes in his essay the example of a woman, Patricia Anderson who was

driving her 1979 Chevrolet Malibu car with her four children and she got rear-ended and her

vehicle burst into flames. Anderson and her children got terrible burns from the accident. The

reason why the car exploded was because the company who had made that car, General Motor

realized that if they inserted the gas tank a few inches closer to the back of the car, it would be

cheaper to make the car, and it would also make it faster which in return would make it so they

could sell more cars and earn more money in less amount of time. General Motors endangered

the lives of its consumers, and the only thing they did was pay the lawsuit, and their debt, they

still continued to make the cars in the way that was hurtful for the consumer. (Bakan 61-62)

Cars aren’t an essential product, yet they are beneficial to people, when they aren’t exploding

from the smallest bump. If people are paying large amounts of money for a product they should

not be paying for defective materials. Patricia Anderson is one of many people that have been

taken advantage of by corporations, because it is more convenient for a company to harm others,

rather than make the product safe for its consumers. Unfortunately this rip-off is not the only

way in which corporations are causing harm to its consumers.

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Even though, I don’t agree with corporations putting profit above all else including the

safety of its consumers, it has a valid reason for using this tactic. Anyone in their right mind

would do what’s best for them, I would make decisions based on what is better for me, the only

difference is that if my decision endangers others I wouldn’t make that decision. I can see why

corporations do this heinous crime, yet I believe that there should be a line as to how far

corporations should go in making their products, and putting other people’s lives in danger is

definitely crossing that line. It’s murder in disguise, the corporation is killing people and all they

have to do is pay a few fines for harming others. When a court ruled that General Motors had to

pay a significant amount of money to Patricia Anderson, the woman who got rear-ended in a

vehicle that had the gas tank positioned a little closer to the rear of the vehicle, the Chamber of

Commerce sent the jurisdiction to an appellate court arguing that the jurisdiction was unfair. The

Chamber of Commerce pointed that jurors are, “not well positioned to make accurate risk-utility

assessments in cases involving complex engineering issues… that they are sometimes led astray

by the fact that they see before them the injured plaintiff…” (Bakan 65) What the Chamber of

Commerce is trying to prove is that the lower level courts are basing their decisions on feelings,

and that they shouldn’t be that way, they have to look at the case in a different way. Bakan later

points out that the courts aren’t putting into account that the way of producing the cars is more

beneficial to the company and that it is “immoral” for the company to not manufacture the

product in such way that is harmful to the consumer. Although I believe that this argument about

lower courts deciding on the jurisdiction based on feeling is a very valid point, I still believe that

corporations should not put their profit above the safety of the consumer, and my judgment is not

based on feeling, but rather what I see as moral.

Corporations not only harm the general public by providing products that are defective,

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but the production of such products cause a lot of pollution and waste, corporations also lack the

courage to admit their misdeed. Bakan writes in his book about externalities, which are costs that

people pay when an entity produces something, those who pay are the ones who had nothing to

do with that production. These costs aren’t only financial; they also include the poison

surrounding people, and health issues that come with these emisions. These inconveniences are

causing problems in society, it is killing people, yet there is no stop to these pollutions,

corporations are finding loopholes to the laws placed against harming the environment. Pavan

Sukhdev, is the Founder-CEO of GIST Advisory, which is a firm in which they help

corporations manage their impact on natural, and human capital. He writes an

article, “Sustainability: The corporate Climate Overhaul”, in which he says how corporations

harm the planet, not only by emitting pollutants, but also by putting it’s wants and needs above

the consumers’. Then he talks about how sometimes people blame the consumer, when in reality

the problem of these externalities is caused by corporations.

As Sukhdev mentions, “Consumerism is often blamed, and consumers can indeed

make crucial choices on the basis of how much material and energy is used for

making, packaging and transporting goods. But on this road of economic choices, it is

corporations, not consumers, in the driver's seat, and they are driving us in the wrong

direction. Corporate advertising converts our insecurities into a chain of wants, needs and

excessive demands, which have made our ecological footprint exceed the planet's ability

to produce resources and absorb emissions — by more than 50%”

-WWF Living Planet Report 2012 (WWF, 2012).

Corporations are driving us toward destruction, and they even have the decency of blaming

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others for their decisions. This quote explains how corporations inflict insecurities and a lack of

confidence upon people for there to be high demand on their product, which takes away from

natural resources. Not only is our environment being polluted, but resources are being extracted.

The environment isn’t the only thing corporations are taking advantage of they are also

taking advantage of their employees. The employees are being forced to work the most that

corporations can make them work for the least amount of money. The corporations are

overworking their employees, and paying them way below the minimum wage since these

horrific conditions wouldn’t be allowed in developed countries, corporations have resided to

build their companies in developing countries. Joel Bakan, the author of The Corporation,

mentions how corporations build a company in developing countries with the public intent of

providing jobs, and bringing the developing country’s economy up, but their real intent is to

exploit the workers so that it can bring the corporation more profit. Bakan writes in his book how

the working conditions are in places like Honduras, Nicaragua, China, or Bangladesh.

“Behind its locked doors, mainly young woman workers are supervised by guards who

beat and humiliate them on the slightest pretext and who fire them if a forced pregnancy

test comes back positive. Each worker repeats the same action-sewing on the belt loop,

stitching a sleeve-maybe two thousand times a day. They work under painfully bright

lights, for twelve-to fourteen-hour shifts, in overheated factories, with too few bathroom

breaks, and restricted access to water (to reduce the need for more bathroom breaks)...”

(Bakan, 66)

It is more convenient for corporations to have companies in developing countries due to the

fact that the employees have no rights, whereas in developed countries they do. Such working

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conditions wouldn’t be acceptable in developed countries because people have more power,

while in developing countries the people have to be submissive to the corporation’s rules or be

fired, and because the people need the little money they earn they can’t afford to fight for their

rights. Once the corporation has exploited the workers so much that there is underproduction the

corporation closes the company down, and all the employees are left without work. Corporations

advertise that they help the developing countries by providing jobs, and money, but in reality the

only ones who are seeing money is the company, and when it stops earning as much as it was

before; it just picks up its belongings and leaves the country in worse conditions than how it was

before the company had arrived.

Corporations are taking over our world, and we have no say in it. Their emissions are

ruining the air we breathe, and no matter how much people fight to put more regulations on

them, they have enough power to override our fights. We are not safe; their products could be

defective and dangerous. Corporations cannot be trusted, yet they provide us with products that

benefit us, yet at the same time their products can harm us. Everything and everyone is in the

corporations grasp, even if a corporation has a company in the developed countries, countries on

the other side of the world are at risk of being exploited by corporations, not only their citizens,

but their natural resources as well. They can be deceiving and say their intentions are to help

countries, and provide beneficial products for people, but their actual intention is to earn as much

money as it can to make its shareholders happy.

Works Cited

Bakan, Joel. The Corporation: The Pathological Pursuit of Profit and Power. New York: Free, 2004. Print.

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Sukhdev, Pavan. "Sustainability: The Corporate Climate Overhaul." Nature. (n.d.): n. pag. Nature.com.

Nature Publishing Group. Web. 13 June 2012. <http://www.nature.com/nature/journal/v486/n7401/

full/486027a.html>.

Lessons about the corporation blog #7

The top 5 things i learned about corporations and corporate power are
1. They exploit workers, they make them work extreme hours per day with little pay.
2. They put the bottom line above all else, they basically risk people lives in order to earn more money.
3. I didn't know much about the concept of externalities, before now i know that the corporations make others pay for their wrong doing.
4. Another thing i learned about the corporation is that they say that they are being green, yet their actions prove otherwise.
5. The reason why some products are cheaper than others is because the corporation exploits the workers.

What i learned from my research was that the corporations provide products, to make life easier, and they have responsibility towards society. Also that the bottom line is very important, because they need money to pay their stockholders. One more thing was that people think corporations are great, but in reality they cause lots of harm.

Is there any way the government can reduce the power that corporations have.

-Would corporations change their tactics if people stopped buying from them? why? or why not?
-What can we as individuals do to change what the corporation does?

Blog Assignment

What is the value of social responsibility?

The value of social responsibility is for the corporations to not harm people or the environment. That they cause no harm to others, unfortunately even if corporations try to be socially responsible, they still fail, it is in their nature to be socially irresponsible. They should put the customers needs before their own needs, but corporations are selfish and reach for their self-interest. This is what causes them to be socially irresponsible, because they only care about their own interests, while they affect everyone in their way, even the people that buy their products we are being fooled into believing that what they are selling us is good, it can cause harm, and they won't tell people.

Revision Plan

Blog Assignment Title: (Title your blog posting like this) Unit 1: Revision Plan

Today’s date:  05/07/2012

DUE DATE: 05/09/2012 (before class)

Directions/Description- Please write a response to the questions below- be sure to number them on your blog (For example, 2a, 2b, etc.) Read over your peers’ comments and annotations Review the expectations of the essay (minimum requirements) and determine if you have met all the minimum requirements. Did your peers guess your thesis correctly? Yes/No Yes my peers understood my thesis. Did you peers believe your thesis is an arguable one?  Yes/No Yes they did. What, if any, revisions do you think you need to make to your thesis based upon the annotations and comments your peers made? Explain. If you don’t think you need to revise your thesis, explain why not. I need to rephrase my thesis so it is clearer, and I have to make sure that I can prove my points. Choose TWO comments from your peers that you believe are the most helpful to you. Then explain how you will use these comments to help you revise your essay.  Indicate the name of the person who made that comment in parenthesis. Comment 1: The strongest part of this essay is the points…(Susie Amaya) This will help me revise my essay, because now I know I only have one topic per paragraph. Your response: How will you use this comment in your revision?  Comment 2: Yes but can be developed more to be strong (Erick Gatchalian) Your response: How will you use this comment in your revision? I have to develop my analysis more for it to be good. Are there any other important ideas you have about how you can improve your essay? Explain. Make sure that the order that I put the things in my thesis are the same as the order in my body paragraphs.

Tentative Thesis Unit 1

After reading Rodriguez's book Hearts and Hands: Building Community In Violent Times, I now have a better understanding of why there is violence in our communities, it's deeper than there being evil people in the world, which is the assumption as to why it happens. I think that the solutions that society has put in place to "fix" violence In our communities aren't very successful: putting people in places that are filled with corruption won't help them overcome their violent ways, nor will having zero-tolerance policies that make it so our children feel on the defense in a place where they should feel safe, and lastly our society should have faith that these people will be better, they don't trust them, which i think makes them also not have trust in themselves.

Looping In-Class Freewrite

In-Class Free-write-Discovering Thesis:

My view on violence is different then it was before, because now I see violence as more than just people physically hurting others. There is a deeper reason as to why they do it, and unfortunately society doesn’t accept those reasons. They just automatically assume they are bad people, and send them to institutions where they don’t learn to do better, but instead learn to keep doing bad decisions. His solutions to the problem are reasonable, I agree with him in that parents and the community should be more involved in Youths’ lives. I hate zero-Tolerance policies, I hadn’t noticed them before, but now that I know about them it makes me angry that schools are so cruel to students they should be given chances to improve, yet because of these policies students are forced to fall. I feel that the way to improve violence is not by locking people up and expecting them to be better, but like Rodriguez said, give them sentences that make a difference.

They just automatically assume they are bad people, and send them to institutions where they don’t learn to do better, but instead learn to keep doing bad decisions.

Society doesn’t give these people a chance to improve their lives. These people are thrown into prisons that have even more corruption than the outside world. How can people become better people, when they are forced to change themselves for the worse, because prisons force them to. They are forced to do things to survive in the prison world, yet when they are out of the prison world and into the outside world they are so used to doing things like they did in the prison world that it is hard for them to readjust to the outside world. It is sad that people put so much money into the prison system, just so they can keep making money from the prisoners, they should instead focus on helping the prisoners take control of their lives, but because there is so much greed in this world, money is the most important thing in this world, and it shouldn’t be.

How can people become better people, when they are forced to change themselves for the worse, because prisons force them to?

People are thrown into prison supposedly to learn to do better, to learn that they messed up and now they have to pay in order to fix it, yet instead of learning that, they are learning how to become better criminals. With all the crime and injustices in our prison system, the criminals aren’t learning to do better, they are learning how to do worse. The only way people can learn how to act in a community is to be in a community. They are taken from their community and thrown into the prison system, and they learn how to act in the community except they learn how to act in the wrong community. Then when they are let out back into their old communities they have accustomed so well to the prison community that their old community is not a part of them and they are not a part of the community.

The only way people can learn how to act in a community is to be in a community.

Sometimes the criminals are put into jail because of how they are forced to act in some communities, or else they could get hurt or made fun of. I can pretty much bet people don’t join gangs because they aspire to do so, sometimes some factors come into play fear being one of them. The fear of getting jumped, or the fear of not having someone to have your back. Sometimes that’s how communities are and the “criminals” are adjusting to how things are. Same goes for those who are let out of the prison community they can’t adjust to the outside community, even though, they were there first.

Unit 1: Building Community/Facing Violence- Chapters 6, 8

Griselda Mercado Huerta English 1A Reading Blog assignment 2 April 20, 2012 6. "Yes,parents should provide their children strong anchors in a truculent sea of pain and doubt." (p.78) this quote is the authors view on what parents should do for their children, although he believes that families can't fully save the children. He believes that parents should help their children overcome all these problems. I chose this quote because I like the way it sounds "strong anchors in a truculent sea" it has good diction and it makes you visualize the parents as actual anchors and the sea has violent waves. I think this quote is important, because I believe that parents are the anchors of children, they should be there for their kids in tough times. 8.  "The agent mentioned to him that the majority of those who come out of boot camp end up going back to prison." (p.96)  what the quote is saying is that basically boot camps aren't very helpful. Since the agent said that the majority of them go back to prison. This shows how there is a problem with our jailing system. I thought this quote was important because it shows how unfair our communities are with these people, they don't stand a chance, once there in and out they'll be right back in again. They get misplaced and find it real hard to find themselves. This quote makes me angry, because it is unfair that basically their lives are ruined once they go in once, because the majority will go right back in,

Building CommUnity/Facing Violence-Initial Reactions

Griselda Mercado
Susie Huerta 
English 1 A
April 18

1. "But then as a wise man once said, the 'lost causes are the only ones worth fighting for'(p.29) The author is trying to say that people like Pedro are the ones we should try to help. This quote stands out to me, because i like the ay it sounds, and it is trying to make it so people will help those that are in need. The other youth the ones that aren't in gangs are doing well, and don't need as much help, yet the ones that need more help are not given that help. I think he means that if you help the, there will be a sense of accomplishment. this quote makes me feel that if people help these youth things would be better for them.

2. "'This will be an example to other gang members,' the judge said." (p.42) This is talking about Pepe when he was given the punishment of 40 years for something he didn't do. There was false information given in court that blamed him, and the judge gave him this sentence, because he assumed Pepe was in a gang and he was trying to scare people in gangs so that they know that if they ever have a hearing they will get a bigger punishment just by being in a gang. I think this quote is important, because it shows how unjust our courts are. Sometimes they punish the innocent harshly just to prove a point, a point that is unconstitutional, because there shouldn't be higher sentences if people are in gangs. This quote makes me angry, because it is unfair what his punishment is, 40 years for something he didn't commit is awful. I don't like the inequality that he got. 

3. "Today much of sons and daughters have gone insane, whether they are shooting their classmates, using drugs, or becoming precocious consumers." (p.52) This is trying to answer why young people are in gangs, or drugs. It's saying they are crazy that that is why they are doing those things. The author is trying to say that that is the general assumption. I don't like this belief, because I think there are many factors that come into play as to why people join gangs or do drugs. It makes me feel that people just assume others are crazy if they are doing things that aren't accepted.

Blog assignment #10

What surprised you about my comments? Why? What surprised me about your comments was that my essay was coherent. Usually when I write I have too many things going on that I sort of lose focus and go off onto different topics. Your comments showed me that I'm improving and my essays are making more sense! In this essay my ideas made sense and I tried to explain as much as I can I tend to think that people can read my mind and I don't have to explain what I think, but I'm getting out of the habit of that.
2. What comments did you find the most helpful? Why? The comments that I found more helpful were the ones about me using coordinators well in the last essay, I didn't really use any which made my essay seem confusing. Now I learned how to use them correctly and I'm trying to write less commas.
3. What comments did you find the least helpful? Why? I didn't find any comments not useful.
4. Based on my comments, what ONE part of the essay rubric do you think you should focus on and improve upon in your next essay?  Explain and be specific. I think one thing that I should still work on is explaining, I usually forget to be specific I use words like it, they, things, which makes it unclear of what I'm talking about.
5. Grade your effort: based upon the time, energy and focus you put into understanding the readings, your process work, class participation and the final essay itself, what grade would you give yourself on your effort? Why? Be specific about what you did to ensure you did well on the final essay (including meeting with your Pass the Torch tutors, and/or office hours) B+' I don't think my essay was that good, I need better diction... My words are too simple, I need to include bigger words into my vocabulary. 
6. What will you do to ensure you do well on this next essay? I will try to use similar tactics like the ones I used for this one. I have to make sure I know what I'm trying to say so I can say it correctly. EXPLAIN a lot! I have to be more specific.
 

Writing Journal #1

Griselda Mercado

English 250 B

Huerta

Writing Journal #1

Democracy

Democratic participation is people being involved in the politics of a society. I define it as people going out and voting. Democratic participation is something we should do if we want things to improve. Some examples of people participating in a democracy would be to going out and voting, or lobbying, or striking. In a democracy everyone has a voice and we are given rights, and no one should have the right to tell us what to do/ not do, but unfortunately our democracy is flawed. Another example of people participating would be by the simple vote of stating your opinion and giving your intake on problems, creating awareness. That could do a lot. Some reasons why people would choose to participate in a democracy would be because they want to make change they see the problems with our society and want to do something to improve that problem. Another reason would be because they see the flaws in our society and want others to see it as well.

learning blog #9

1. What are the differences between “weak ties” and “strong ties” ?

The differences between weak ties and strong ties, is how much you know the person. In a weak tie you wouldn't really risk your life for the cause another person is telling you about, because you're more like acquaintances, than close friends. Strong ties are those who you know very well as a person, and you will want to help them more if they are close to you.

1. Why is social media an effective tool for spreading awareness?

Social media is an effective tool for creating awareness, because it is easy, all you have to do is post something and your "friends" see it and maybe they'll post it as well, and that gets many more people to see it. The friends of your friends will raise awareness and soon enough many people have seen what is going on. Another thing that makes it effective is that it is fast! you can get a lot of people to see or hear something at one time, rather than spreading it by calling each person individually.

Final Essay #2

Perfect schooling

            Many people agree that our educational system is inadequate, and isn’t doing what it’s supposed to, and that it should be fixed. For example, Jean Anyon writes a report, “From Social Class and the Hidden Curriculum of work” in which she deliberately points out the faults in our schools. She does some research and concludes that our educational experiences are based on the income our parents make, and where they can afford to live has an effect on the way the children are being taught. John Gatto is a teacher that wants to show people what he really teaches his students, he does this in his essay, “The 7 Lesson School Teacher.” He removes the cloak on what the schools are teaching kids; which is to conform to the roles their parents have, and to not try to strive for the opportunities that are available to them. Another person who gives his opinion on what schools should be doing is Gerald Graff. Graff says that for students to learn they should be allowed to apply their lessons to their interests. These people, as well as many others have different views on what schools should teach, but most agree that our educational system needs a lot of improvement. I agree that our educational system is faulty, and I think that there are many things that should be resolved, but the ones that I think have the most urgency are the inequalities based on the parents’ income, the things that the children are being taught, and the topics having no relevance to the students lives.

            Our society would be better if we had more people with better jobs. I think the only way to achieve that is to have our educators teach the children, to strive forward, instead of teaching them to stay in the same position as their parents. Anyon showed the different ways that different teachers teach in different places. The children with the higher income parents would be taught to think for themselves to be leaders, while the ones with the low-income parents were taught to conform, and to listen to the person in charge. The higher income students are being taught to take the role of leaders, while the others are being taught to listen to those in power, so this deliberately causes the lower income students to work the low-paying, hard labor jobs, and to continue being a part of the middle or lower class. This way of teaching keeps the gap between the rich and the poor, it assures that there are only a few that have money while the rest are struggling. If we get rid of this inequality and teach every child the same way regardless of financial issues our society would be better. We would have more people earning more money who would then put it back into the economy, because they will have money to spend and  not only would our lives flourish but our economy as well.

If the system would encourage all teachers to teach students equally regardless of the income level they’re in, our nation would be much better. There are some teachers that already go against how the system says they should teach.  For example, my third grade teacher was very tough, and she made the whole class work a lot. I remember one thing she made us do was recite a poem in front of the whole class and our parents that was difficult, but it was a good experience. Anyon states that the teachers in low-income schools wouldn’t let the students decide things on their own they’d be like robots doing exactly as the teacher told them to do step-by-step. My 3^rd grade teacher let us either choose a poem of our own or make one up. She let us take charge on our assignment, we got to choose whether we wanted to make one up or recite one. By forcing students into doing something the way the teacher says doesn’t allow them to think for themselves, they basically regurgitate what the teacher tells them, which in a way makes them lose themselves in the system. I find myself a bit lost right now, all my life I’ve been told what to write what to say, and how to say it, that now it is hard to come up with my own ideas, while I presume the higher income students have no problem coming up with ideas of their own, because they’ve been taught to be critical thinkers most of their life. I do believe that the lower income students are at a disadvantage, and that income shouldn’t be a factor on how the students are being taught, but unfortunately it is.

            Children are being taught in a way that leads them to little or no success. They are being taught to stay in the same jobs their parents are in, they are not all given an opportunity to reach for more. The problem with this is that only some succeed, and those few that do are the ones with the majority of the money. They have the luxurious cars and beautiful 2 story houses in the most expensive places to live in, while the rest of us suffer to make ends meet. In his essay, John Gatto says that he teaches students 7-lessons and those 7 lessons ensure that the students get the knowledge to work for people instead of being their own bosses. They are being taught to stay in one place, and that place has no room for innovation, they are stuck in low-paying, hard labor jobs. Gatto says his fifth lesson is intellectual dependency, “Good people wait for a teacher to tell them what to do. It is the most important lesson that we must wait for other people, better trained than ourselves, to make the meanings of our lives.” This example proves my earlier point that they can’t be the owners of their lives or of businesses, because they are not well trained, they have to wait and be told what to do instead of taking charge and making their own decisions. It shouldn’t be this way, we should govern our lives as we decide and to do what is right for us. We shouldn’t be taught to listen to others. What job opportunities do we get with this lesson? We only get the hard labor and low wage jobs. We can’t strive to be lawyers or doctors, if all we’re being taught to do is to listen to the decisions made by others for our own lives.

            I think that if students are allowed to use their interests to learn it will be easier for them to grasp the lessons. Schools are utilizing all these books that have no relevance to the students, which makes it hard for them to understand the overall message of the books. Graff mentions on his essay how when he was younger he had no interest on what the teachers were teaching, and that he knew a lot about sports he could go into deep critical thinking conversations in regards to sports, but since he lacked interest in the topics that were being taught he didn’t have the same enthusiasm towards the teachings. His overall argument is that if teachers use students’ interests in the classroom it will be easier for the students to understand the concepts, once they master the ability to think critically in their interests, Graff says that they’ll be able to think critically in more “intellectual” topics, such as the readings of Plato, Shakespeare and many others. I agree with Graff’s proposition I think it is a reasonable point. If the students know how to think critically in their comfort zones, it might be easier to think critically, in more challenging topics. I find it easier myself to talk about things that I like, or that are relevant to me, than stuff that were mentioned in school. Most of the book I read in high school didn’t make much sense, because I couldn’t relate to the readings. There was no argument that I found interesting, but now that I read some different type of articles that I could relate to, for example the articles done by the people I mentioned I could understand what they meant because I could think of examples that happened to me in school.

Our educational system is faulty, and changes need to start happening now. I believe that everyone will benefit with an improved system. We shouldn’t let our students’ future be based on their social class. I also believe that our economy would also be better if schools were better and their focus would be to get them to a higher education instead of keeping them in the same place they are. Our education should relate to us in some way, otherwise it doesn’t really seem like it’s ours… We need to learn about ourselves in the process and if there are stuff that have no interest to us, nor are relevant, those lessons won’t stick with us, it will only be learned so that we can pass the test.

Reflecting on Peer Response Workshop #2: Revision Plan

Griselda Mercado

English 250 B

Huerta

Learning blog 8

1. By reading the essays of some of my peers, I

2. My peers told me that my thesis is pretty good, but I am going to change it completely, I’m going to put my own words on my thesis, my own ideas, I’m going to introduce the writers I have in my essay in my body paragraphs.

3. Yes, my peers told me to that my weakest paragraph didn’t have enough evidence, and that I need to integrate direct quotes in some. I plan on improving my paragraph by better explaining my point, and thinking of better examples, or explaining why I used the ones I put.

4. Sort of. I tried to put just one point, information for that point, and explanation. I forgot to do that on my last paragraph, that’s why it’s my worst.

5. Based on my peers response I think the best part of my essay would be my introduction, but I still have to fix it up a bit.

6. I think the part of my essay I should spend more time revising are my body paragraphs I need to make sure that my examples prove my point, and I have to explain my quotes, and how they relate to my point.

7. I asked my peers if the quotes I integrated went with my point on each paragraph, my peers said that they did, except for my weakest paragraph, because it is unclear how my example ties in with my point. I am going to revise my third paragraph, and look for a better example.

Reflecting on Essay #1 Feedback

Griselda Mercado

1. What surprised you about my comments? Why? What surprised me about your comments was that my points don’t make sense in some paragraphs or they’re not outright stated. This surprised me, because now I know that I have to be more specific and every time I add the word that or the I have to specify on what I’m talking about, because what makes sense to me, might not make sense to other people.

2. What comments did you find the most helpful? Why? The comments that I found most helpful were the ones that said what I had to improve on. They were most helpful, because now I know what to pay more attention on in my writing for example, where to put commas it seems as if I LOVE commas and I put them in many places where they don’t belong.

    3. What comments did you find the least helpful? Why? I honestly don’t think there were comments that weren’t helpful, even the good comments were helpful in that they let me know which things I did correctly.

4. Based on my comments, what ONE part of the essay rubric do you think you should focus on and improve upon in your next essay?  Explain and be specific. On my next essay I should focus on where I place my commas, I get excited writing those. I write way too many, more than I should. I should watch where I put them and make sure they really belong there.

5. Grade your effort: based upon the time, energy and focus you put into your process work, class participation and the final essay itself, what grade would you give yourself on your effort? Why? Be specific about what you did to ensure you did well on the final essay (including meeting with your Pass the Torch tutors, and/or office hours) I would give myself a B, because I feel like I should’ve spent more time on my essay, revised it a few more times, make sure my topics made sense, and that I didn’t completely ramble on what I was trying to say. Also limit the amount of run-ons and fragments in my essay. I met with you for office hours to make sure my essay made sense. Your feedback was really helpful.

6. What will you do to ensure you do well on this next essay? I will get my ideas together and know what it is exactly that I’m trying to say/ prove. I’ll try to not write as many commas, and only have one topic in each body paragraph.

Brainstorming and generating ideas: Essay 2

What case can be made for or against schools emphasizing divergent thinking?


I think divergent thinking is a good thing, and to encourage it is good as well. It allows for creativity, and expanding of the mind. Students are forced to think that there is one answer for one question, yet they should be encouraged to see the many outcomes from the question. When i was younger I would ask TONS of questions, I would question EVERYTHING, people to this day remind me of how i used to be. They would tell me "when you were younger , you would ask so many questions, for example, if the dog was sleeping you'd ask why? and i would say because it was tired? and i would yet again, ask why? and so on and so on. Now I don't question things like i used to, i accept an answer that is given to me, if i agree with it. I think that it is a good thing to see things in many ways, for example philosophers have many theories as to why things happen, and they are super smart, they think out of the box.

What would prevent rote memorization from happening in schools?

If teachers focused more on getting the children entertained on the subject they wouldn't just have to memorize it for the test, if they like it they'll pay attention and they'll understand it more. Instead of just making them remember a bunch of facts that they'll be tested on they should go more in depth than just making them remember the random facts that they'll be tested on. Rote memorization is not learning, it seems like it is a form of the banking concept, teachers are drilling information into the childrens' minds and expecting them to memorize it so that they can repeat it out on the test, doesn't even matter if they understand it, as long as they remember it, they pass.

What is the difference depth and breadth?

The difference between depth and breadth is how much detail is put into the topic. When something is in depth it means that there is more than the surface area of a topic towards it. When it is in breadth it means that only some of the things are present. For example, when something is in depth the teacher provides much more information, rather than what the students will be tested on. It is more than what is required to be taught. In breadth is just a simple explanation of a topic. For example when teaching about WWII if you were to go in depth, you'd say what were the causes that it had to do with Germany being angry with its inflation, and they wanted to blame someone and they took it out on the jews, and how the U.S. didn't want to get involved and the whole thing with Japan a breadth explanation would be WWII started because germany was angry and they killed a bunch of jews.

Is it possible for teachers to plan lessons based on a students interest in learning?

I don't think that it is possible for teachers to plan lessons based on students interests, because everyone likes different things, it is hard to involve everyone on one particular topic. What is interesting to some might not be to others. For example, many people like football, but for me, i honestly don't get it, and i'm sure it is a good sport, i'm just not really interested by it... while somethings that i think are cool, might not be too interesting to others. I think the only way to do that would be to split the children into groups where they have similar likes, yet i don't think that is very productive, because then it wouldn't seem much like a class, because everybody is doing different things.

Thinking about education: Freewrite response to Anyon

Susie Huerta

English 250B

Blog assignment # 5

-Do you believe that the difference between schools Anyon observed are a problem in a democratic society? Why or why not?

I believe that the difference in the schools is a problem, because we are not getting an equal education. It is like discrimination. It seems to me, like a subtle way of discrimination, and the parents have no say in how they’re kids are being taught because that is where they live if they want a better education for their kids they have to move to a more expensive place, and sacrifice other things, like food for example, for them to get a better education. We are deprived of an equal education, I don’t necessarily think that we won’t be able to get as far as the more privileged kids, but I think it will be harder for us to get to that level, because we have to learn all that they have learned throughout their entire lives in a few years.

-In what ways do your educational experience reflect Anyon’s obervations?

When I was in elementary school, we had to ask to go to the bathroom, even in high school. Also had teachers who didn’t care about the class, and a few who didn’t teach, yet they expected us to know the material. All of my English classes just showed us where to put commas and the different punctuation marks, but to this day I don’t really know where colons go and I still write run-ons and fragments. I think that the teachers probably taught us only that, because like the ones in the observations they also thought that that was the only things we would need, but they’re wrong! We will go further and get the same job as the other students have!

Final Essay 1

Griselda Mercado
English 250B

Diagnostic Rough Draft

January 20, 2012

Group minds

People are told that they should make their own decisions, and to think, and speak in any way they want, but sometimes what we don’t realize is how much we depend on the opinions of others’. Doris Lessing explains in her speech, “Group minds” that when we are in a group, be it family, friends etc. we tend to put our opinions aside if we don’t agree with the majority. We hop into a “band wagon” effect, where we follow others because of popularity or to be included, we want to be part of that group, and we feel that by doing as they do, we will be accepted. Lessing says that if the majority of the group believes in a particular way, the minority at times will fall in line, whether they agree on that opinion or not, they’ll probably input their ideas, but later say that they were wrong, if their opinions don’t coincide with the majority. She says that when we are in groups our own decisions are ignored, and we take in the opinions of the majority, something she calls the “group mind”, she also says we are not aware that we are following the group mind. This affects us, because we as individuals don’t fully speak our minds, we follow others’ opinions more than our own, when it should be the other way around. Lessing says that to get rid of the “Group mind”, we should all be educated into the horrors of it, and to acknowledge our mistakes and follow our hearts, and to forget the guilt that comes from following the group mind. I agree with her proposal to make people aware of the whole issue of the “group mind”, yet I don’t think that acknowledging our mistakes is enough to get rid of the issue.

Some of us know that what we do sometimes when we follow others isn’t always the best choice. It would be better for us to know how to follow our own hearts and take others’ considerations at times, not always. However, I think it is in human nature for people to change their opinions depending on others. Sometimes when that happens, it’s because we want to see the pros and cons of our decisions, we want other people’s intakes on the decision. For example, when choosing a college I have to admit that others opinions had an influence on my own. My parents were telling me to go to one college, while my friends were giving me benefits of going to a different college. It was hard to choose, because my parents would tell me one thing, and then my friends would tell me something that would contradict what my parents had said and vice versa. It felt as if I wasn’t in full control of my decision, I would change my mind every time I talked to my parents or my friends. I think that is the worst thing about the group mind, that people lose control of their own choices, and the choices they make aren’t fully their own.

Lessing says that there is much information out there that some of us are not aware of. She proposes that we include the general public in all the affairs happening today, I agree with this part of her proposal. My parents didn’t go to college so they didn’t know too much about universities, but what they did was they asked people, who had gone to college. The ones who went to college know what it’s like and they can advise others who didn’t. My parents didn’t know much about college, so it was difficult for them to advise me on what to do. They had to go out of their bubble to find out that information, it is hard for people to do that, and I find it hard myself. My example proves that there is knowledge out there that some of us aren’t aware of, and not only that, but it is also hard for those who don’t have that information to get it. As Lessing put it, “If I describe an experiment or two, then anyone listening who may be a sociologist or psychologist will groan, Oh no, not again---for they will have heard of these classic experiments far too often” She later says that for those who aren’t sociologists or psychologists her experiment was new information they probably haven’t heard of before. My point is that the general public is at times excluded from bigger issues, probably because they don’t know what’s going on or, because those who know aren’t going out and sharing their knowledge. The ones excluded have to go in search for those answers, while the ones who have them, keep them to themselves. I think it would be better if those who know would go out and include others in the bigger conversation.

Peer pressure can make kids do things they probably shouldn’t do. I think it is safe to say that all of us at one time in our life have done things we aren’t proud of because others were doing it, or we wanted to hang out with them. Later on in life they’ll remember those things they did and feel ashamed and remorseful. Lessing proposes that people let go of that shame and guilt, and learn from it; it already happened, they can’t change the past, but they can learn from it. I think people should let it go and change, and try to follow their own opinions, but I also think that doing that is harder than it seems. For example, the whole issue of slavery, first there was slavery, then segregation, and when segregation was illegal, there was still de-facto segregation, which was segregation by custom and tradition. People know that what they’re doing is wrong, but that doesn’t mean they’ll change from one day to another, it takes years, decades even. The majority has full control so things won’t magically change from one day to the next. Even though, we try to change things they won’t always be completely gone, things might get better, but that doesn’t mean they’ll be gone for good. I think that Lessing’s proposition is a good start, but I think the issue is more than just about the group mind, I think that for the issue to get solved the individual has to take that jump and avoid listening to the “group mind”.

I don’t think that her proposal of letting people know of the group mind is enough to eliminate the power some people have over others, because some issues have more relevance to some people than it does to others. For people to stop listening to other’s opinions and start focusing more on their own, it has to come from them, they have to take that step and start listening to their own minds. It is one thing to tell some one that what they’re doing is wrong, and a whole other thing for them to change it right away. It depends on how the person will react, some will completely agree and stop following other’s opinions and state their own, while others might understand it and not do anything about it, and the others, the majority, probably won’t realize that they’re inflicting their beliefs unto others. Lessing said that “When put as badly, as unflatteringly, as this, reactions tend to be incredulous: “I certainly wouldn’t give in, I speak my mind…” But would you?” She implies that people say that they wouldn’t give in, but when the time comes to go against the majority they’ll probably give in, and not state their own opinions. This proves my earlier point that it is easy for people to realize it, and accept that it is a problem, but it’s not as easy to make a change. The change comes from how they see the issue of their own opinions being mutilated by others, on how badly they think the issue is, some will be extremely angry, and others might just be displeased. The extremely angry ones, will dramatically stop listening to others influences, while the displeased ones might stop a few times, but won’t take that jump and ignore others opinions as willingly and as quickly.

People should be aware of the group mind having an effect on us, because it happens to everybody, and it doesn’t let people make their own decisions. It doesn’t allow people to speak their own minds. They get so caught up in the group that they forget about their own wants and desires, being selfless is a good thing, but there are times when you come first. Our future should only be chosen by us, not by anyone else. I admit that by introducing the issue of the group mind the issue won’t be completely eliminated, but it’s a start. Lessing has a good proposition, but we need to let the people make their own decision of following their own minds.

Reflection on peer response and revision plan

Griselda Mercado

English 250B

Blog #3

1. The most helpful thing about the peer response session, was that I got to get feed back on my essay, I have an idea of what parts of my essay I need to rephrase, and which parts don’t make sense.

2. The least helpful part of the peer response session was that we couldn’t actually talk to each other, we just wrote what we thought, but we didn’t say it out loud.

3. I am going to rephrase the wording in my 2^nd paragraph, and add a few things to my introduction to make sure all the things I wrote are my ideas and the ones that I got from her, I gave her the credit. I have to EXPLAIN my examples, and say why they relate to my point.

4. I went to office hours, and I will read my essay out loud various times to see where it sounds awkward, and I’m going to ask my brother to read it to see if it makes sense.